Freefall

I’ve posted it on the wall at work. Finally, after a year! A piece of paper that authenticates my capability of doing something completely unorthodox, crazy and extremely dangerous.

I think its quite amusing that its my boss who noticed it first. He chuckled 'I guess we're all a little crazy to work here'

I stuck the skydiving certificate exactly a year after I've done it. There’s no sentimental reasoning behind this. I've always wanted to post it up at work. Everyone else has diplomas, degrees and accreditations to various societies and institutions.

I have a certificate which stands for 'this guy is capable of doing insane stuff' . And I must admit, it fuels more conversations than a university degree or two would ever do.

"Was it scary?"

is pretty much the first question I always get asked.

The jump was scary. There’s no denying that. You can see it on my face in the video! My heart racing, hands sweaty, body odour of the tandem master. And no way did I anticipate it being that cold 14000 feet above ground. So yes, it was scary.

But I didn't think that was the scariest part. I’d put the dive in the same category I would for a roller coaster or the octopus ride in a theme park. You do it, its scary, thrilling, exciting and fun and then you go abouts your normal routine afterwards.

For me, what was scarier, are things I do for my girl :P

But honestly, I've always wanted to go skydiving. The same way I want a Mazda Rx-8. I wanted to do it, but its not in my ‘ things to do in the next 10 years’ list.

But there was an urgency for me to jump. My girlfriend was jumping - with or without me.

Never mind the stress and worry I drove my poor mom to when I told her of the jump. Never mind that at that time I had no money and I needed to sell things to afford it. Never mind that an asian guy died doing skydive with the same company just a few months before.

I took all of that, put it aside and told my girlfriend, 'Nope, you are not jumping alone'.

If she ever had to go through something terribly scary or outrageous or troubling in her life, I am going to be there by her side.

Just like the song, 'anywhere you go, I’ll follow you down,'

I would have forgotten about the skydive if it wasn’t' for events of last week that ended up the exact same way it did last year. It humoured me that most people have changed and that those that I wish had grown up a little, remain exactly the same.

This in turn reminded me of the worry, anxiousness and loneliness that plagued me the days counting down to my birthday. The days after the skydive, the most stressing time in my life.

Never did I think that I would be a heartbeat away from losing the one person I’d never want to lose.

My heart still races when I think of that day. I remember everything spiralling downwards in insane speeds.

And there was nothing there to catch the fall. Nothing.

That was scary.